My Emo Vortex is my current sketch book. I carry it pretty much every where I go . Some people keep a journal or type things in a computer based notebook. Me, I keep one of these. It’s my forth one since early June. It’s a record of my thoughts, faults, fears and insecurities. Yeah, I know all the bad stuff right? Hence the title.
However, it is pretty well encrypted. Riddles almost. Seemingly random, but fun I hope. The whole book contains 82 pages. I have 46 pages covered in ink so far. Since it’s on the go I try to keep it simple with only a ball point pen. Color found it’s way into a few of the pages though. I find this therapeutic, a way of venting. I try my best to capture random ideas and concepts in the raw. Believe it not these images make no sense to me at first, but I know it means something to me. As the scribbles and shapes are wiggled out I look for the image inside that makes the most sense to me at the time. Loosely similar to a Rorschach test except instead of ink blobs it’s lines.
The strange and somewhat abstract drawings are my attempt at translating my complex (to me) ideas and questions. Like singularity theory, Quantum Physics, Astronomy, synthetic/organic biology and chemistry. I sometimes have erratic dreams of these concepts played out as examples. Sometimes there are words I don’t understand that I have to wake up and reference. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe any of this to be premonitions. I believe my subconscious is trying to comprehend and translate things I’ve overheard. A few words have came up meaningless like “neosphere” and “ionic Stasis”.
Crazy shit right? A guy could go insane thinking about these things especially with no former education of said concepts. It’s the reason I carry these sketch books. I review them trying to understand whats’ going on in my stupid brain. I realize it is in fact, stupid based on the bigger ideal that I can only see the tip of. I suppose this explanation is a little more insane than it looks from the doodles (well, maybe a different kind of insane).
Some of other drawings are character concepts I’m trying to work out, or my lame attempt at poetry. I can admit I’m a terrible poet, but this will not stop me from trying sometimes. Every sketch book has it’s own name. It’s an easy way to catalog for me. I write this post to give some idea of the reasoning behind the drawing. I know it’s not supposed to matter what the artists intent was, but rather the observers interpretation of the piece. I know this. Yet I still feel compelled to rant about it. After all, it’s the reason the intergods created blogs in the first place.
I will leave you with a few pages from the book. I will begin the update here with new pages, page numbers and if I feel compelled again explanations.